Growing up, I was always afraid of going to bed. When I laid down, I always felt
scared and extremely vulnerable. I never took my glasses off, and would always fall
asleep with them still on my face. I was always worried that somehow Gollum
would come and try to kill me (usually I thought he might try to strangle me).
Recurring Dream- (that I thought was so odd I told people about it in
French/Spanish Camp and North Country and St. Joseph’s):
I was walking down the stairs, and the stairs kept getting longer and having more
steps. Finally, for some odd reason, I ended up on the balcony/patio. There was a
middle-aged man and gollum/smeagol standing leaning over the rails. They then
threw themselves over the railing and started falling to the ground. Then the
ground sort of disappeared. I got scared, and ran away as fast as I could, but I kept
on ending up there, and they kept on throwing themselves down- and I couldn’t
stop them. When I tried to grab the man’s arm, it was like I was a ghost and I went
through him. And he fell down again, anyways.
When I was around 8 years old, I became very interested in Greek Mythology.
When reading about Heracles and his many adventures, I became disturbed and
terrified of the innkeeper who chopped his guests legs off if they were too tall, and
stretched them if they were too short to fit the bed exactly. Even though, I think
Heracles may have killed him (I don’t remember- Funny fact: I rarely have ever
reread anything in my life, but I still remember all the things I have read and even
conversations), I would be very scared when lying down to go to sleep. I never had
nightmares of this character, but I would always be too frightened to close my eyes,
as I convinced myself that he was hiding somewhere, waiting for me to put my
guard down, and then he would come out and stretch me- this is how I started
having the habit of trying to fill out the whole bed when I laid down to sleep.